My face crumpled as I remembered more and more of her. But the memory kept going down and down the lane. When for the first time she held my hand, I was happy, astonished. I kept looking at it, a greenish vein visible right from her wrist and vanishing somewhere between fingers. I could see our hands literally sparkling in early evening sunlight! This was when she took initiative and held my hand. She now wasn’t behind nor a step or two ahead of mine. Now this was real togetherness, she always talked about. I held her hand even tighter. I could never let go of it. That little vein swelled. We looked in each other’s eyes and smiled. I know this is nothing but ordinary but this was also a life!
My face tormented even more as I kept sliding down the memory lane. She always liked silent beaches. I liked seeing her enjoyment that started anew everytime we visited one. She raced ahead against salty breezes. It left a hair, single strand of it, her hair tickling across my face. I had won a treasure of her. And the best part of it was she didn’t knew. She still doesn’t know it. I stuffed it in my pocket. Moving it across my face at night felt like being with her till eternity. Eternity, that lasted till I dozed off. All these mad adventures of mine, she doesn’t know for good. I lost that single hair strand some nights after! It must have flown out of the window to some love angel…
Wow! so kiddish, funny; or you can call it cliched too. Or was what I felt for her, a cliche too? Was it nothing but ordinary? And was I complete fool to feel like top of the world. Or was she real? Because as a matter of fact, I can see none standing by my side. I am completely alone.
Asylum doctors thinking of continuing my shock treatment further…
I am running down some lane, fast. Someone calling me out. I dont know from where.
7 April 10